Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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