Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
