just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
