There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
