So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize
