On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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