Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
do herpes really smell.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm like, not good at living.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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