I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
