The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
