like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
