if i can run in heels then i can drive
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
