my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
