Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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