I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
