I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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