I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
The adults are the big ones right?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
