Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Randomize
