You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
