it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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