it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
that may or may not have been my penis.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
