Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
