her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
He shit in the fireplace
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