after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
