barbara walters just said penis...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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