i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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