Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
