i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
