Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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