But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
