So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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