**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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