By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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