oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
