yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
