Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
