I'd wear matching sweaters with you
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
