I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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