i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You made out with two different species that night
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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