What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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