My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
