Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
