Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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