and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
