i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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