i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
