i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
