Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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