I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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