everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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