he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
